My Struggle with Establishing Breastfeeding

Establishing breastfeeding is exhausting. During the months leading up to Vihaan’s birth, I started to read about breastfeeding yet I had no idea what I was getting myself into. I learned that establishing milk supply is the key to breastfeeding success. This hinges on the simple mechanics of supply and demand. The more your baby nurses, the more milk your body will produce. But breastfeeding can be extremely painful, it was for me. Here are some of the things that helped me along the way and things that took me by surprise about nursing.

The struggle to establish breastfeeding starts from the moment your child is born with the practice of skin-to-skin. Skin-to-skin is when a newborn is placed on his mother’s body, preferably on her bare chest within minutes of being born and there is skin to skin contact between mother and baby. The baby isn’t wrapped in blanket and the mother’s body/chest isn’t covered by cloth. While there are several  advantages to “Kangaroo Care” such as normalizes the baby’s heart rate and breathing, the most important one for me was to promote breastfeeding. Skin-to-skin encourages the baby to suckle and promotes the release of hormones in the mother which helps lactation. When we checked into the delivery room at Columbus Regional Hospital we were asked if I wanted to breastfeed the child. When I said yes, they prepared me and the nurses for skin-to-skin contact. This is how it worked- moments after Vihaan was born, and the umbilical cord was cut, Vihaan was whisked away for less than a minute. I can only guess at that time the nurses did a quick evaluation to determine if he is healthy. They wiped him down swiftly,  he wasn’t “clean” they didn’t bathe him, the nurses put a diaper on him and literally within few minutes a crying, swollen and distraught new born baby was placed on my bare chest.  And he stayed there for close to an hour! This gave Vihaan and I a promising start to nursing.

What I didn’t know before pregnancy was that the milk doesn’t come in right away. The first five days of Vihaan’s birth I didn’t have any milk. For some women it’s a 24-hour thing and for some it takes a few more days. During this time the body produces an incredible nutrient called colostrum. It is your baby’s  first meal. This thick clear liquid suffices all of your baby’s needs and provides your newborn a whole host of antibodies to protect him from infections.

The days I didn’t get my milk were really nerve wrecking for me. I had completely unfounded worry that I may not get milk at all? Is that even possible? Because it seemed like I waited forever. This time is critical for new moms to not supplement your child with formula. Colostrum is all your child needs and it’s the best for his immune system, his sensitive gut and provides all the nourishment he needs in the initial days.

Breastfeeding was extremely painful for me, as it is for most women. I went to a lactation consultant and was told that I was doing it wrong. So this is my fault? How my newborn latches should be in my hands and I am expected to correct the behavior such that it causes no pain to me, sounds reasonable right? It is if you have 3 arms! One to support the baby’s neck, another to position him correctly and a third to compress your breast to enable a good latch. This is a completely unfair expectation to lay on a sleep-deprived, exhausted, physically beat up new mom. A bit of sympathy and honesty would’ve really helped me at this juncture. My sister recommended I use a nipple shield to improve the latch and ease the pain of breastfeeding. My husband bought a few pairs of nipple shields for me and they were a godsend! My bloody nipples got some much needed relief. Cracked nipples can be so painful that it would make any woman switch to infant formula. It is not just that a bruised nipple is painful, it is that each time your child wants to feed the bruised nipple suffers more trauma. Needless to say I used a lot of nipple cream.

I always knew in the back of my mind that nipple shields are a temporary solution. I started working towards removing the shield mid-session to get myself used to the pain. It took me almost 6 weeks to completely stop the use of shields. Those were a really tough 6 weeks for me.

You know the commercials on TV that depict a calm, almost comatose infant breastfeeding, it was never like that for me! Getting my son to latch on was like trying to control the tentacles of an octopus, limbs flying everywhere, kicking and punching, squirming all the while. He was never a calm eater, I used to refer to Vihaan as my barracoota baby.

Over the weeks my body had finally started to feel like it was getting back to normal. But in order to establish a healthy milk supply I made sure my son was fed every 2-4 hours, even through the night. Vihaan didn’t need to be woken up to nurse, it was like clockwork, every 2 hours he would wake up to feed. Each feeding took 45 minutes to 1 hour. Do the math, I hardly ever slept. My nights would go like this: 10- 10:45 pm feed & diaper change, 12 am up for an hour to nurse & diaper change, 1 am back to bed, 3 am up for feed for about 30 minute & diaper change, 3:30 back to bed, 5 am up for an hour long feed. And so on…

I can hardly believe I survived those initial 6-8 weeks. But for me and my child this is what it took to establish breastfeeding: cracked bloody sore nipples, exhaustion and sleep-deprivation. But we got through it with the undying support of my mother, husband and sister.

Breast milk is liquid gold. It is full of essential fats, protein, lactose and antibodies. Breast milk is live unlike formula and it changes over the course of time. Your body changes the composition of breast milk as your infant gets older to meet his nutritional and developmental needs, how genius is that? It is the best nutrition for your new born and nothing else can even come close to the composition and benefits of breast milk.

I share my struggles with breastfeeding for all the misinformed and dazed new mothers out there and for the clueless new fathers that might think breastfeeding is second nature to women, it is not. Breastfeeding is a learned skill for both mother and child. Fortunately I was surrounded by family that supported my decision to breastfeed and friends who had recently been through the motions that could advise. Once established breastfeeding gets easier. It is so much more than providing nutrition, it is comforting and nurturing. It is a bond so sacred that I feel blessed to share this experience… what can I say my baby is off to the breast start. (Quote courtesy of Top Breastfeeding Slogans )

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